Intricate
by rosiehope
Summary: She wasn't sure how she was going to do it, she had abandoned them both, she had left him all alone with their daughter, and Callie didn't know how, but she was going to make it work with Brandon, he was going to forgive her.
1. Chapter 1

Callie stared at the apartment, the address scribbled hastily on a napkin with a pen that had just enough ink to barely trace out the characters, crumbled up in her hand as she tried her best to summon up the courage it would take to simply walk inside, take an elevator upstairs, and knock on the door.

In theory, it was one of the simplest, most common actions that anyone had ever done in their entire lives, and while she wasn't all that worried about knocking on the door in the first place, it was the who would open the door part that was really worrying her.

She didn't know if she could do this, she didn't even know if it was legal for her to be doing this, she just knew that she was here, and it was taking everything in her not to turn tail and run.

After all, it was what she was best at.

"Uh lady?"

Callie forced herself out of her thoughts to look at a guy standing to the side and behind her, holding a skateboard, with an odd look on his face, "Are you going to go in?"

"I-oh-uh, you go ahead." She said gesturing towards the door as if to say 'be my guest.'

"Freak." He muttered under his breath when he thought he was out of Callie's earshot causing her to give an unladylike and out of character snort.

Oh if only he knew the whole story, then he would really think she was a freak.

She wasn't even sure what she was doing here, well actually she did know what she was doing here, she was just not feeling as brave as she usually did. Life was like that, all balanced out, the two people who had never hurt her, who had done nothing but love her unconditionally, were the two people she had hurt the most, the two people she was the most scared of.

It hadn't been hard finding them, though she wished it would have been, it would have given her an excuse for staying away for so long, but really, she didn't even deserve an excuse, her reasons for doing what she had were simple, she was scared and she was selfish.

It was different this time, it wasn't like the first time when Jude in his childlike anger had excused her of being selfish, when she really hadn't been all that selfish, and she had run away. This time, she had truly, and completely been selfish, and she had left a lot of broken people to deal with the aftermath of that.

He had done well for himself, Brandon, that is. The apartment building, at least from the outside, looked nice, though a lot of things that weren't truly nice looked so to Callie. It was just as tall and intimidating as the rest of the buildings that made up New York City, and despite the fact she had a hard time imagining quiet Brandon living in a city so loud and noisy, she also couldn't imagine him anywhere else.

Juilliard was how he had ended up in New York. Somewhere in the space of the years that separated them, his hand had come back completely, and his piano and classical music had taken him all the way from California to New York.

But that wasn't what had given him the ability to afford a place as nice as this, somewhere between the time he played for Someone's Little Sister, he had found what he had truly loved, and it didn't lie in actually performing music, but rather creating it.

His work was subtle, but ingenious, and Callie found herself listening to mainstream radio music that she otherwise wouldn't have, simply because Brandon had produced it, and anything Brandon touched musically, had to be successful.

Life had been kind to him, or rather it had been unkind to him, and he had chosen to do something about it.

Callie felt the familiar pang of guilt she always felt when she thought about Brandon, she hadn't let herself think about him for four years, she couldn't do it, but he was never too far in the back of her mind, and eventually he had become every thought.

Either that, or she was just tired.

Tired of being lonely, tired of being scared, tired of everything going wrong in her life and never doing anything about it when she could.

She had made this mess, and it was about time she started cleaning it up.

With that thought, Callie forced herself to walk into the apartment building and walk towards the elevator, pressing the number fifteen with shaky fingers.

She used to get panic attacks a lot. It was almost like claustrophobia, having a panic attack, it felt like the walls were closing in around her, restricting the air she could breathe, and making her feel on edge, and freaked out, like something terrible was going to happen.

This feeling was something different, it almost felt like she couldn't function. Like she had to think about every single breath she took, she had to think about putting one foot in front of the other, like nothing was easy, and despite how hard what she had to do next was going to be, everything would become easier at the same.

456.

Apartment 456.

Such an insignificant number, yet it was the number he came home to every single day.

She raised her fist and rapped against the door twice, before she lost her nerve.

It was pure hell. The ten seconds that it took Brandon to get to the door, it was literally hell, and Callie knew many different variations of hell, it was where she had grown up, but those ten seconds were the worst kind of hell she had ever been in.

Waiting was the worst part of almost anything.

Her nails, that she surprisingly hadn't bit off for once, were digging into the palm of her hand, as the audible sound of Brandon's voice came from behind a muffled door, and the knob began turning.

"I understand that but I have other artists I need to work with, artists that have schedule months in advance, I can't just switch that around, you need to be in the studio," Brandon's voice trailed off at the sight of her, and Callie wasn't all too sure if that was a good or bad thing, she just hoped that hopeful look on her face wasn't completely creepy, "I need to call you back."

He was just as perfect as she remembered him. Just as handsome, just as breathtaking, just as Brandon.

His eyes were the same piercing green they had always been, except they almost seemed wiser now, he still wore his dark hair the same way he did when they were sixteen, short but not buzz-cut, he wasn't as lanky anymore, instead his body was more of a lean muscle, but all in all, Brandon still looked like Brandon, just older.

"Hey." She said quietly.

"What are you doing here?" He asked as he stepped out of the apartment, pulling the door shut behind him.

Ouch.

"I miss you, Brandon." She blurted out before she really had time to think through the consequences of that statement.

She did that sometimes, speak before thinking.

"Oh yeah? You miss _me_?" He asked his tone hardening just like his eyes did.

Okay, that was one thing she wasn't expecting, somehow she had this idea, a far-off idea, an unrealistic idea that somehow Brandon would still look at her like he did four years ago. How could he? She had left him all alone.

Life had hardened him, just like it had hardened her.

Or maybe life had just hardened him towards her.

"I miss both of you." She amended.

"Really?" Brandon wondered in a sarcastic tone, "Because you don't even know her, so I don't know how it's possible for you to miss her."

"Brandon," She said quietly trying not to let the tears that were so ready to fall at the sight of him to do so, "That isn't fair."

Once again, Callie had said the wrong thing.

"Do you really want to have a conversation about fair with me?"

"No," She shook her head, "But I do want to talk. And I want to see-"

"No." Brandon cut her off quickly and firmly, "Not a chance in hell, Callie."

"Brandon," Callie said in a pitiful voice that she barely recognized as her own, "Please, just hear me out."

"I don't have anything to say to you." He said firmly before pushing open the apartment door just enough for him to fit through, before he changed his mind and came back out.

Callie almost let herself hope that Brandon was going to talk to her, but she wasn't sure why she kept doing that, getting her hopes up.

"Actually, you know what, I do have something to say." Brandon said so calmly that Callie almost wished he would get angry with her, "Stay the hell out of our lives, Callie. You did this to yourself, you don't get to just walk out of our lives and then waltz back in like nothing ever happened. Life doesn't work like that-"

"I know that, Brandon-"

"-Do you really Callie? Because the way I see it, you're just as selfish as you were four years ago. I missed you. I wanted to see her. It's all just about you, isn't it Callie?"

"No, Brandon, please," She shook her head, bringing a hand up to her mouth as hot tears invaded her vision.

"She doesn't even know who you are." Brandon said throwing the nail in the coffin.

The hallway was silent for a long moment with the exception of Callie's crying, what was there left to say? Brandon had effectively broken her heart with one single statement, of course she shouldn't have expected him to tell her who she was, but she couldn't imagine her not knowing who she was either.

"You never told her?"

"She never asked."

"But what would you have said? If she had?" Callie pushed just needing to know.

Brandon's eyes hardened once again, "Well I sure as hell wouldn't have said, 'Baby, your mommy isn't around because she gave birth to you and then ran away because she doesn't love you."

"It wasn't like that, Brandon." She said in a hoarse tone.

"Really? Because last time I checked you gave birth to a daughter, our daughter, and I left you alone for five minutes to go make sure the baby was okay, and by the time I got back you were gone. You left me all alone, with a baby that wasn't even an hour old."

"I didn't leave you alone," She denied unwilling to let him take away the one thought that had gotten her through the past four years, "You had Stef, and Lena, and Mike, and Jesus, and Mariana, and even Jude."

"Speaking of people you abandoned." Brandon said dryly.

Callie tucked her lips into her mouth for a brief second but didn't reply, what was she going to say to that? While it may have been true, she didn't want to hear it, not once.

"You weren't alone, Brandon."

"I was seventeen, Callie!" He raised his voice, "I was seventeen, and you left me alone with a baby that wasn't so much as a day old. She was our baby, and you just abandoned her, you of all people!"

"You don't understand." She shook her head as she moved forward to touch him, "You don't understand, you have to let me explain, you have to let me explain."

"I don't have to let you do anything." Brandon said stepping out of her reach, and turning back into the apartment, "And I sure as hell don't have to let you see _my _daughter."

And with that, he stepped into the apartment, slamming the door behind him, right into Callie's face as she begged for him to listen to her, and for the first time, left her all alone.


	2. Chapter 2

Brandon sighed heavily as he shut the door, and leaned his back against trying to understand if that had really, truly just happened.

If Callie had really just been standing there behind that door.

She was beautiful. God, four years later and she was still beautiful. Her hair had grown out, though only slightly, her face was slightly thinner, but other than that, Callie still looked like Callie, so beautiful, so infuriating.

She had just shown up out of nowhere, like nothing had happened, like the past four years hadn't happened, but they had happened. He knew that so clearly, in fact that was all he could see when he looked at her now.

The past four years that he had gone through all alone.

All he could see was the four years, the moments that should have been a part of for the past few years, but she hadn't been.

"Daddy?"

Brandon immediately plastered a smile on his face – something that he had a lot of practice doing – that immediately became real at the sight of his favorite person in the entire world.

Dark brown wavy hair fell to her little elbows, bright green eyes were glazed with sleep, and her little face, with all his features, was looking at him expectantly as she held up her small arms.

She was small, even for her age of four, but it was something Brandon appreciated, not worried about.

"Hey pretty girl." Brandon smiled as he picked her up from underneath her arms, "What do we want for breakfast?"

"No breakfast." She refused just like she did every morning.

"Yes breakfast." Brandon countered just like did every morning as he placed her down on the granite counter, as he opened a cabinet with one hand, and kept another hovering around his daughter, making sure she didn't fall off the counter in her actions of swinging her little legs.

"You want some cereal?" He asked pulling out the box, "We haven't had that in a while? Or we could just settle for a banana."

"No breakfast." She repeated.

Brandon sighed, they had this argument every single morning, he wasn't sure what her aversion was to the meal, but he just didn't seem to have the same kind of patience he did every other morning, though this morning hadn't exactly started off like the rest.

"Pick one." He said as the phone rang and he reached over to get it, "I mean it. Hello?"

"Hey love, you awake?"

"Yeah," Brandon smiled at the sound of his mom's voice echoing down the line, "You know how it goes."

"I do," Stef agreed, "Which means the little monster is up as well then?"

"In all her monster glory." He confirmed.

"So I actually wanted to ask you something?"

"Gee mother, my life is good, how about yours?"

"Oh great, thanks for asking," Stef replied in true Stef form, "So about that favor?"

"So now it's a favor?" Brandon asked as he raised his eyebrows at his daughter who was now starting her own little chant that went something like 'no breakfast, no breakfast, no breakfast.'

"Would you just let me ask?" Stef cried exasperatedly.

"Sorry," He laughed, "Go on."

"So there's this writing contest thing in New York next month, and Lena and I can't get off work, and that essay Jude wrote, the one I told you about, well his essay is representing the state of California, so I was wondering if he could stay with you for two nights, it wouldn't-"

"Sara Hope!" Brandon raised his voice only slightly, though his voice was more stern than anything else, as his daughter slammed the back of her foot into the counter, "Enough, pick one, before I pick one for you."

Sara stared at him for a long moment, eyes identical to his own, but her facial expression all Callie, as if gauging if he would actually go through with it, before silently picking up the box of cereal, she knew even at four years old, Brandon didn't say anything he didn't mean.

"You should be nicer to her." Stef commented.

"Mom, if I was Sara, and I threw a fit every morning over breakfast, I promise you, you would not amuse me every single day." Brandon countered quickly.

"That's true," Stef said conversationally, "I probably would've locked you in a closet and starved you till you promised to eat every morning."

"Sounds about right," Brandon said dryly, "And yes, Jude can come stay with me, and I will get him to his essay contest."

"You don't think he'll feel bad do you? That Lena and I aren't going to be there?"

Brandon considered the question for a moment as he pulled the milked out of the fridge, poured it into a bowl, and put the bowl in the microwave, so the milk wouldn't be cold, but it wouldn't be warm either, just the way Sara liked it.

"He's seventeen Mom, no I don't think he'll care."

"Yeah well when you we're seventeen, you were getting girls knocked up."

Brandon grew silent at the familiar rib that hit a little too close to home that particular day.

"B," Stef said slowly waiting for him to spill the information.

He hated that, how even on the other side of the country, in a completely different time zone, his mom could still tell exactly what was going on with him just by the sound of his voice.

"Our friend," Brandon said vaguely, not wanting there to be any room for Sara to get curious off of something she heard him say, "Came to see me today."

The line was quiet for a long moment as Stef processed the information, and Brandon picked up Sara and put her down on the floor, so she could go sit at the table where Brandon had placed her food.

"Callie came to see you?"

"Not even a half an hour ago." Brandon confirmed.

"B," Stef sighed drawing out the letter again, "Is she okay?"

Brandon gave a wry laugh, "Isn't it funny? How even after all that she put me through, that's the first thing I thought when she showed up, 'is she okay?"

"Well?"

"As far as I can tell she's fine, but," Brandon spoke almost bitterly, "She misses me."

"Wow." Stef said simply, that was when you knew things were bad, or at least actually surprising, when even Stef had absolutely nothing to say.

"And she wants to meet our littlest one."

"Are you going to let her?"

"No." Brandon said simply.

"Well that's your decision, B." Stef said simply.

"You disagree." He stated.

"No, I don't. From your standpoint, I wouldn't let her within five miles of my kid, but the thing is, she is always going to be my kid, so I'm just a little biased." Stef said diplomatically, something Brandon wasn't sure he actually knew how to do.

"Daddy, I don't want the orange Fruit Loops."

"Then take them out and put them on a napkin," Brandon said grabbing a napkin and handing it to her, "But you need to finish everything else."

"Is that all she said, that she wanted to see you both?"

"Pretty much, I didn't really give her room to talk about much else."

"What do you mean?"

"There is the possibility that I may have verbally assaulted her," Brandon said dryly, "Just a little."

"Well maybe she deserved it, just a little." Stef said lightly, "Do you think she's going to come around again?"

"I don't-"

"Who's that?"

"Nana," Brandon replied before continuing on, "I don't know, she seemed serious, but honestly-"

"I want to talk to Nana!"

"You can in a minute," Brandon answered as he was cut off yet again, "Honestly, I don't have that much faith in her."

"You used to have a lot of faith in her."

"You know exactly what changed Mom."

"I'm not asking you to forgive her." Stef reasoned, "I'm incredibly angry with her too, in fact I'm furious with her, I'm just saying that don't be so quick to think that the Callie we knew isn't still in there somewhere."

"That's what worries me," Brandon said almost grimly, "That the Callie we knew is still in there somewhere."

Stef sighed, "I'm sorry you had to grow through all this Brandon."

"I'm not," Brandon said with a small smile as he leaned against the counter watching Sara pick the orange Fruit Loops out of her food with the utmost look of concentration. He wouldn't have changed anything, not even if he could change the fact that Callie had left.

Sara was who she was because of everything that had happened, and he couldn't imagine loving Sara if she was anyone but who she was.

"Sometimes I forget that you grew up through all of this B, I forget that my baby isn't really a baby anymore."

"I don't know what I'm going to do when she grows up." Brandon admitted as Sara attempted to move a piece of hair out of her face, only to succeed in getting the milk from her fingers on her face.

"Make her drink lots of coffee, I heard that stunts growth." Stef suggested.

"Thanks Mom." Brandon laughed, "But I think I've still got a few years before I have to resort to that."

"You're call love." She replied, "Now let me talk to the person I really called for."

Brandon rolled his eyes but handed the phone to Sara as he grabbed another napkin to get the milk off her face.

"Hi Nana!" Sara cried excitedly as she handed Brandon her spoon, and pointed at the last few orange Fruit Loops.

Brandon rolled his eyes fondly.

Yes daughter, let me pick out the Fruit Loops that you don't like, but really they all just taste like cardboard sugar.

Yes daughter, let me clean your face up while you get my table dirty.

Yes daughter, let me feed you while you talk to my mother.

Brandon shook his head, as he coaxed a bite of cereal into Sara's mouth. Sometimes he wondered how his moms had done it.

They had raised five kids – though Callie was more of a depends on the day kind of deal – all while holding down full time jobs, and they had not made it easy.

Between Jude battling all the scars the foster system had left him with, Mariana selling pills and seeing her birth mother, Jesus having a different girl every week, and him and Callie getting into all the messes they had, before it all had finally resulted in Sara, it was a wonder how either of his moms had a single hair left on their heads.

And Sara, for all his complaining, was one of the easiest kids in the entire world, and despite the fact that his opinion was biased, the statement held true. As long as she had someone's shoulder to put her head on, and someone willing to carry her around, Sara didn't want or need anything else.

Brandon carried Sara's now empty bowl to the sink, as the landline rang, something that only rarely happened, considering he never gave anyone that number, he really only had it because it came with the apartment.

"Hello?" He asked.

"Mr. Foster, we have a message for you that was left with reception."

"Yeah, that's fine," Brandon sighed already having an idea of who left the message.

"It's from Callie, she would like you to meet her at the café down the street at two o'clock."


	3. Chapter 3

"_What's that?" _

_Brandon folded the paper he had been looking at back up, and stuck it in the envelope, before looking back up at Stef, and smiling slightly. _

_She was standing at his doorway, Sara – whose little hand was waving around trying to grab Stef's necklace – held against her tightly, considering she wasn't swaddled up into a blanket._

"_I'm not sure yet." He replied vaguely as he put the envelope on the desk and stood up._

_Stef opened her mouth to push the subject but just in time Sara burst into tears. Two days old, and she was already looking out for her not-so old man._

"_Oh come on." Stef protested with a slight whine, "Why can't you just let me hold you?"_

"_Because she's Callie's daughter." Brandon said quietly, "It's not in her nature."_

"_Brandon," Stef said slowly – drawing out the syllables as he took Sara from her, instantly quieting her cries._

"_I'm fine, Mom, it's not like she was my daughter." Brandon said roughly though not harshly, "You know you can go out and look for her right? I don't need a baby-sitter."_

"_I know you don't, honey, but Lena's out looking for her, and you just brought Sara home, and-"_

"_Mom," Brandon interrupted, "Seventeen years from now if Sara ever pulled this crap, I promise you all I would be thinking about is how worried about her I am, and how badly I'm going to kick her ass once I find her."_

_Stef laughed slightly, "The difference being you've only got one kid to worry about."_

"_And you have five, not six," Brandon said gently, "You worry about your daughter, and let me worry about mine. You can worry about me, from twenty miles away, you'll still know where I am."_

"_You have a daughter," Stef said suddenly, "My baby has a baby. How did I get so old?"_

"_Well-" Brandon began as Stef laid herself down on his bed with a heavy sigh._

"_Don't answer that." She interrupted._

_They both fell into a comfortable silence for a while, as Stef laid on the bed, and Brandon sat on his desk chair, his feet propped up onto the bed with Sara lying on her back, on his upper legs. Brandon smiled at her, murmuring soft words that made no real sense, but kept Sara quiet, though that may have had something to do with the fact that she probably thought Brandon was some crazy person._

"_Oh," Jude said surprised as he entered Brandon's room – no one in his family had ever really learned how to knock, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to interrupt."_

"_You're never interrupting love, come here." Stef said sitting up and patting the space next to her, "Do you need something?"_

"_No," Jude shook his head as he sat down, "I just thought I'd see if Brandon needed any help with the baby."_

"_We're all good," Stef said, "But that was really sweet of you to ask."_

_Brandon looked at Jude for a long momemt. He still looked younger than his age of thirteen, but today, there was something in the look on his face, something that made him seem so much older. For the first time, it felt like Brandon was looking at the Jude that had spent months in the foster system alone, without his big sister to protect._

_Suddenly, he didn't look so helpless and young, just a little lost._

"_Actually," Brandon said as he looked down at Sara for a brief second, before picking her up, and dropping his legs to the ground, "Why don't you take her?"_

"_Take her?" Jude repeated._

"_Sure." Brandon nodded, "You should spend some time with your niece."_

"_Are you sure that's okay?" Jude asked standing up, "I mean she's really small."_

"_I'm sure." Brandon nodded resisting the urge to laugh at the look on Jude's face._

"_What if she cries?" Jude asked as Brandon gently transferred Sara from his arms into Jude's._

"_Then I'm just upstairs, but I don't think she's going to cry for a while." Brandon promised as he gave his daughter an almost pleading look not to screw this up, and just wait to do all the crying she wanted, after she was out of Jude's arms._

"_Can I take her to the backyard?"_

"_Just sit in the shade," He smiled._

"_Be careful, buddy!" Stef called as he left the room, staring at Sara like she was only baby in the entire world, almost like she was supposed to be an extinct species, but she was there._

"_What?" Brandon asked as his mom stared at him for just a second too long._

"_Yesterday, when Lena tried to take her to the living room, you nearly bit her head off, but you're just fine with giving her to an emotionally unstable thirteen year old."_

"_First of all, right now, I don't think any of us are all that emotionally stable," Brandon countered, "And second, yesterday, Sara was only a day old, she had no business being out of my sight."_

_They both fell into a silence as Brandon waited for his mom to say what had so obviously been eating at her since she had walked into his room, baby in tow._

"_What are you going to do, Brandon?" Stef asked sadly, "If you have to do this without Callie, how are you going to make this work?"_

"_One day at a time." Brandon shrugged._

"_But you can't think like that anymore, B." She protested, "You have school on Monday, have you thought about if you're going to go? Who's going to watch Sara while you're doing that if Callie isn't here? How are you going to work while taking care of her? Don't get me wrong B, Lena and I are going to help as much as we possibly can, but I have to work, and Lena's going to start her new job soon."_

"_I don't know what I'm going to do mom," Brandon said quietly as he looked towards his desk where the envelope laid, "I guess I'm just going to love her, and hope that I don't screw my kid's life to hell._

"And you've got your homework?" Brandon asked again just to be sure, he wasn't going to listen to another lecture from a pre-school teacher about the importance of teaching your child about being prepared for class.

"Yeah."

"What about your crayons?"

"I couldn't find the purple one." Sara said solemnly.

"I'll find you one." Brandon promised putting her down on her feet at the door of her classroom, and squatting down, "Alright, I'll pick you at three."

"And you'll bring me a purple crayon?"

"Yeah," He laughed running a hand through her hair, "I will bring you a purple crayon."

"Okay, bye Daddy." Sara smiled getting on her toes, "Kiss?"

Brandon smiled widely, as he felt a feeling of warmth that he really needed pass over him, if he had known that having a kid felt like this, that having a person in his life that put such an absolute amount of faith in him would feel this incredible, then maybe he wouldn't have been so worried about having a baby.

He kissed her before standing up and waiting till she had put her things away in her little blue cubby then sitting down at her little, before leaving the pre-school, the world feeling just a little bit heavier without Sara's presence.

Brandon sighed as he stood with his back to the pre-school, if he turned right he would be able to make it to his class that he had timed perfectly so he could always been on time to pick up Sara from pre-school, but if he turned right, he would be walking back in the direction of the apartment building's street.

He pulled out his cell phone to check that time, as if hoping that somehow without him realizing it, it was already past two o'clock, and he no longer had to make the decision, but considering the world hated him, it was exactly 1:45.

He stared at the picture on his screen for a long moment. It was just a simple picture, one of Sara sitting at the dining table, holding up a picture she had drawn, a wide smile plastered across her face, but it was what made him turn to his left.

As far as he was concerned, Callie didn't deserve a chance to explain herself, she didn't deserve to know Sara. But Sara deserved to know why her mom had left her, Sara deserved to know the truth, someday when she was old enough to understand it.

Someday, when Brandon himself understood it.

"You came." Callie said in a quiet but surprised tone as she stood up at the sight of him.

"Let's just get this over with." He muttered sitting down in the seat across from her.

"I-okay," She said sitting back down uncomfortably, "Where's Colleen?"

"Sara." Brandon corrected.

"What?"

"My daughter, your daughter, her name is Sara." Brandon said in some twisted part of him finding some sense of satisfaction in the way that Callie's face fell when she realized that something she had believed for four years was wrong.

"I thought, we agreed we were going to name her after my mom."

"We agreed a lot of things, Callie, you started all of this." Brandon said before feeling slightly guilty and explaining, "Look I was going to name her Colleen, even after I realized you were gone, but she wasn't a Colleen. You never even looked at her Callie, her name's Sara. She practically named herself."

"Brandon I-"

"Just tell me what you want, Callie," Brandon cut her off, "Because I have a class to be in, and I have to pick Sara up."

"I just want to make this right, Brandon. I want to be in her life, your life."

Brandon wasn't sure what pissed him off more, the fact that she was sitting in front of him saying this, saying that she wanted to be a part of his life, or the fact that it was so obvious that she actually meant it. All of this, would be so much easier if she hadn't meant it.

And more than anything else, it completely and totally irritated him that he could still tell when she was being honest and when she wasn't.

"Well you can't, you can't make it right. You can't just undo four years." Brandon said firmly.

"Will you just let me explain?"

Brandon didn't want to, he didn't want to let her explain at all, she hadn't given him an explanation when she disappeared from the hospital without a so much as a 'I'm not dead,' but then her voice had to go and crack, and he could see the tears forming in her eyes, and even after everything she had done, Brandon didn't have it in him to deny her of that one thing.

There was a time when Callie could look at him like that, and Brandon would have given her the entire damn world if she had asked.

"I was scared Brandon," She sighed, "Sophia was going through a hard time and I had to take care of her, Liam was back and he kept showing up everywhere, I couldn't control my panic attacks, Wyatt wouldn't leave me alone, and I was waiting for your moms to kick me out of the house at any second, and I was just so scared, Brandon. I wasn't ready, I wasn't ready to be a mother, when I had never had a mother."

"Actually," Brandon said coldly, "You had two, in fact, you still have two. You're just too selfish to see it."

"Brandon wait!" Callie called after him as he stood up and began walking out of the café.

"For what, Callie?" He yelled, "For what? I have been waiting for you for four years, damn it! And you never came, so I moved on, I don't need you! Sara doesn't need you!"

"But I need you!"

"No you don't," Brandon shook his sadly, lowering his voice, "If you had needed me Callie, you never would have left me."

"That's not true, Brandon." She shook her head as she finally started crying.

"Isn't it?" He asked, "Because the way I see it, you didn't walk away from me just once, you did it twice. And I am done blaming myself for your mistakes Callie."

"I just wasn't ready Brandon." Callie cried, "I wasn't ready for a family, I wasn't ready for you, and I sure as hell wasn't ready for a kid."

"And you think I was?" Brandon asked incredulously, "Do you think I was ready for a baby? You're not the only one in the world who's had a hard time, and honestly, Callie, after everything the foster system put you through, it makes me sick to think that you would even let there be a possibility that your daughter could go through the same thing."

"There was no possibility Brandon," She shook her head, "There wasn't ever a possibility you would leave her. You aren't the type of person who can just walk away."

"No, I'm not," He admitted before hardening his tone, "But you turned me into someone who could walk away from you."

"Brandon wait!"

"What?"

"Just," Callie flattered, like she hadn't thought he was actually going to reply to her, like she hadn't actually planned what she wanted to say, "Why Sara? There has to be more to it then she just didn't look like a Colleen."

Brandon sighed, there was more to it, but the answer to that was still incredibly simple.

"The name Colleen reminds me of all the bad things that have happened to you Callie, it reminds me of all the bad things in the world, and my daughter, isn't any of those things. And if I could actually control it, I would make sure Sara never knows what sadness or pain is."

"And Sara?"

"It means pure, and happy, and soul." Brandon said, "It means everything she represents, everything I want her life to be."

"_Brandon?" Lena looked up from her conversation with his mom, "What are you doing home? You only went to school like an hour ago."_

"_Where's Sara?" He asked dropping his book bag._

"_Upstairs, sleeping," Stef replied, "Love, is everything alright? You could have called if you were worried about her, she's fine."_

"_Just give me a second," Brandon said as his dad – who he had texted on his way home – entered the house, "I'll explain in a minute."_

_Brandon took the stairs two at a time, before slowing his pace and quietly pushing open his bedroom door, and entered the area that had once house his keyboard, and guitars, and all other musical instruments. _

_His little corner space now housed Sara's crib. She was fast asleep, thankfully, and it didn't look like she had any intention of waking up till she was hungry._

_He grabbed the envelope that was now crinkled and messy, just like the paper it housed, after being folded and unfolded so many times._

"_Brandon what's going on?" Mike asked as he came back down the stairs, "You need to be in school."_

"_You asked me what my plan was," Brandon said looking at his mom, "You asked me how I was going to raise Sara without Callie."_

"_I did," She nodded._

"_I'm moving to New York." Brandon said flatly as he pushed the envelope over to her._

"_Say that again." His dad said sharply, as if daring him to let the words escape his lips again. Unfortunately, Mike didn't really scare Brandon all that much, if he had been Stef that was a whole other story, but he wasn't._

"_I'm moving to New York."_

"_Are you insane?" Mike nearly exploded, "You are seventeen years old Brandon. You are not packing up and moving to New York. What purpose would that serve? What would you do? Where would you live? Who would live with you? You aren't even a legal adult yet! Not to mention Sara, you cannot just take Sara and run off whenever it suits you, Callie will be back, and I don't think she's going to appreciate you running off with her child."_

_Brandon tuned out his dad as he watched both Stef and Lena read the two papers that the envelope contained with neutral facial expressions._

_Stef sighed running a hand through her hair once they had put the papers down._

"_Is this all for real?" _

_Brandon nodded, "This is it, Mom. This is the plan."_

"_You and Sara will be by yourselves all the way across the country, Brandon. You understand how far this is right?"_

_Brandon nodded, it was one of the things that had influenced the decision the most. He had been sitting there in AP Calculus, trying to understand how the subject was relevant to his life at all. He had bigger problems such as how he was going to pay for diapers, or how he was going to buy clothes, or what was going to happen if Sara ever got sick._

_Eventually the supplies his moms had bought for Frankie, for when they thought they were going to have a baby, would run out, and he couldn't live of his parents. He couldn't support his daughter, on his parent's money. It wasn't right._

_And then he had just decided, if he was going to do this, he had to do it by himself, he had to get away from Anchor Beach, he had to get away from home, he had to get a fresh start._

"_Do you trust me?" Brandon asked._

_Stef nodded, "Even after everything."_

"_Then trust that I wouldn't do anything that wouldn't be in the best interest of my daughter."_

"_So you're moving to New York."_

"_I'm moving to New York."_

"_Excuse me?" Mike yelled, "You can't make that decision in two seconds flat, Stef."_

"_I didn't make the decision, Mike! He made it himself." _

"_So what now we're letting our kid make the decisions?"_

"_He's not a kid anymore Mike," Stef said lowering her voice, "He has a kid, and he has to do what's best for his daughter."_

"_And moving to New York, that's what's best for Sara?" _

"_This letter is from Juilliard," Lena cut in holding it up, "They're aware that Brandon has Sara, and they are still offering him a full scholarship, with living expenses paid for, and all he has to do, is commit to starting next semester."_

"_And move across the country! He hasn't even graduated high school, he can't go to college!"_

"_I'd get my GED." Brandon said quietly despite the fact that no one was listening to him._

_He was used to this, the three parents arguing about him like he wasn't there, but it didn't bother him like it used to. Maybe it was because he finally believed that he was capable of making his own decisions, or maybe it was the sheer determination that he had to make a life for Sara._

_To give her something more than a dad with a high school education, pulling double shifts at some restaurant, while still needing his parents financial support._

"_And what about money?" Mike asked, "Living expenses mean they pay for a place for you to stay, not for anything you need, like food for example."_

"_That's this letter." Lena said holding up the second one, "There's a studio that's ten minutes away from Juilliard, the studio that signed Someone's Little Sister, their willing to give Brandon a job, a job that pays almost as much as you and Stef make per hour, helping out in the studio, if he's willing to help produce songs as they need it."_

"_He's seventeen."_

"_By the time he actually moves he'll be eighteen, you legally can't stop him, Mike." Stef said gently._

"_Sara won't be eighteen."_

"_Sara's my daughter," Brandon said just as gently as his mom had spoken, "You have no legal claim over her."_

"_That's not what I meant."_

"_We know Mike," Lena soothed, "He just means that Sara's age isn't a factor here, her well-being is the important part."_

"_What about Callie?"_

_Brandon hesitated before finally going to his backpack and pulling out the manila folder that contained papers that he had gotten drawn up last week, and slid them over._

"_You're applying for sole custody?" Mike asked after looking over the papers._

"_I'm giving her till I move to New York." Brandon said hesitantly, "If she doesn't show up, then as far as I'm concerned Callie doesn't get to make any decisions about Sara."_

"_Are you sure this is what you want, B?" Stef asked._

"_Of course it's not what I want," Brandon replied, "I want Callie to be here, but she isn't, and as much as all of us don't want to say it, she's a flight risk, and I'm not going to let her be in Sara's life only at the moments that are convenient for her. If Callie doesn't show up in the next year, I'm going to make sure that in the court's eyes, Callie abandoned her daughter."_


	4. Chapter 4

"_Callie?" Brandon asked sleepily as she pulled at his covers forcing him to scoot voer and make room for her._

"_Move." She whispered as she climbed in._

_It took a few minutes and a lot of tossing and turning, but eventually Callie managed to make herself comfortable in Brandon's tiny bed._

"_Mom is going to castrate me if she finds you in here." Brandon said despite the fact that his face was more amused than anything._

"_It might be a little late for that." Callie muttered underneath her breath._

"_What?"_

"_Nothing." She shook her head as she lost what little courage she had when she walked into Brandon's room._

_Over the past two years, Callie had been in his room more times than she could could. She had seen it as an angry foster kid, she had seen it as Brandon's girlfriend, she had seen it as an almost member of the Adams-Foster family, and now she was seeing it as well – whatever she was now._

"_Are you going to tell me what's wrong?"_

_For just a brief second Callie's mind jumped to a thought that scared her more than anything._

_If she really was, what she thought she was; would Brandon still be around to know when something was wrong? Or would he run far, and would he run fast?_

_Just as quickly as the thought came, she pushed it away, Brandon didn't run from anything._

"_There's this thing." She said quietly, "That has the potential to be a thing."_

"_Could I get that in English please?"_

_Callie swallowed hard but forced the words out of her mouth, "I think I'm pregnant."_

"I want to sympathize with you, girl, I really do, but they took my Tasha away from me, I didn't give her away."

"I didn't give my daughter away, Daphne." Callie sighed, "I just-"

"Ditched her in a hospital?"

"Left her to Brandon for safe-keeping." Callie said loudly over her.

"You did what you had to do, girl." Daphne said finally, "Now you have to let Brandon do what he has to do."

Callie sighed again as she pulled her knees up to her chest, and looked around the tiny motel room she was currently occupying. While Brandon had found success and stability, Callie was still roaming around unsure of what she was looking for, and clueless as to how she was supposed to figure that out.

"You good?"

"Yeah." Callie replied, "I'm good."

She waited till Daphne had hung up the phone, and the busy signal was beeping, before she finally reached over to grab her cell phone.

She hated the picture on the front of her screen more than anything. She hated the way Brandon was looking at her, so sure of her. She hated the way his hand was placed on her stomach – that had the slightest of bumps – so protectively, so sure of the baby.

And she hated the way she was sitting, leaned into his chest, looking up at him, so sure that they could make everything work.

Callie wondered when that assuredness had been replaced by paranoia and fear and doubt. She wished she knew the exact moment when that change happened, so that she could go back and do everything differently.

She wondered if Brandon ever felt like that, if he could go back to the moment Callie had changed her mind, and convince her to stay.

Maybe if she had stayed her life would be in New York with Brandon and Sara.

God, Callie hated that her name was Sara.

It was a beautiful name but it took away the one thing she knew for sure about her own daughter. She had never even looked at her, she didn't know if she had dark or light brown hair, she didn't know if she had brown or green eyes. She didn't know anything.

She didn't know what she liked to eat, or what her favorite color was, or what her middle name was, or if she preferred white bread to wheat, or what made her laugh, what made her angry, she just didn't know.

Callie wasn't sure if it was those haunting thoughts or something else, but something had made her go back to Brandon's apartment, and sit outside with her back against the wall and her knees pulled up.

She wondered how it had come to this, her so pathetic that she was sitting outside his apartment door, and him so angry that he could barely stand the sight of her.

"You can't do this Callie." He said quietly his eyes filled with the same storm that they had been two days when he had basically told her to 'go to hell' in the middle of a café, in hindsight a more private setting could have been better, "You can't keep showing up here. It's not just our lives you're messing up this time."

"Just hear me out." Callie said standing up onto her feet hastily.

"I did that." Brandon replied leaning his back against the opposite wall of the hallway, "I didn't really care much for what you had to say. All I really got from it was you were scared, and you ran. It's always the same story with you."

Callie almost wished Brandon was yelling again, it would have been better than this cold indifference that he had going on.

"What kind of bread does she like?"

"What?"

"Never mind." Callie shook her head as the stupid thought entered her head once again, "Where is Sara?"

"That's not your business."

"Would you just stop it?" She cried sharply, she hadn't come here to argue, _but god, _Brandon seemed to have an ability to piss her off, "Quit talking to me like I'm some cheap one night stand, who left a baby at your doormat nine months later."

"No you're worse than that." Brandon scoffed, "You made me think we were going to do this together, you made me think that we were going to be a family, that we would figure it out, you gave me all the false hopes and promises, and then you just left us all there in the hospital."

"Oh so now you get to angry for the entire damn family?"

"Yeah, Callie," He nodded standing up straight, "I do, because you may be a mother, but you aren't a mom. You have no idea what it's like to wake up and not have a damn idea where your kid is, because you don't love anyone that much, but-"

"-That's not fair, Brandon."

"But you put Mom and Lena through it, without a second thought. You left after you kissed me to run off with Wyatt, and then you left after you had Sara, again with Wyatt."

"It was never about Wyatt!" Callie practically screamed.

They both fell silent as an apartment door opened, and a head poked out, both of them were breathing heavily, but neither spoke till the door closed once again.

"The fact that you even think I care about Wyatt tells me that you've learned nothing these past four years."

"And what exactly was I supposed to learn?" Callie asked, "Huh? You keep going on about how I haven't changed, or what I'm supposed to know, tell me what am I supposed to know?"

Brandon stared at her for a long moment, as she dug her fingernails into her palms, this wasn't how this was supposed to go. She was supposed to come and sit in front of his apartment, and beg for his forgiveness, and refuse to leave till he forgave her.

Except it wasn't in her nature to grovel, and because even after all this time Brandon knew her better than anyone, he knew exactly what buttons to push.

"Her favorite color," He said quietly, "You're supposed to know her favorite color, and her favorite book, and what she likes for breakfast. You're supposed to know what to do when she has nightmares, or when she can't sleep at night. You're supposed to know what makes her feel better when she's sick, and you're supposed to know that once you have a child, everything else stops mattering, what you want, what you care about, it all stops mattering. You're supposed to know that I don't give a damn that you ran off with Wyatt, I care that you ran off, leaving a little girl without a mom."

Callie wiped at the tears that fell off her cheeks. Didn't he think she knew that already? Didn't he think she understood how badly she had fucked this all up? Because she understood, she understood it well, she was living it.

"Toasted." Brandon said quietly as he unlocked the door, "She likes her bread toasted, white, with Nutella on top."

"_Callie?"_

_Callie turned around, wiping the last of her tears, and sniffing, hoping, praying that somehow Stef wouldn't notice that she was crying, but there was no point, the second she turned around she knew that Stef knew._

"_Brandon told you, didn't he?" She asked quietly._

"_Yeah." She nodded, "He did."_

_Callie waited, waited for the fall out, for the yelling, and the screaming. She waited for Stef to throw her out the house, to tell her to pack a bag, and this was the last straw. She waited, and she waited, but it didn't come, and slowly she peeked her eyes open._

"_Oh Callie," Stef said softly when she finally looked at her, "Do you have that little faith in me?"_

"_I don't know what I'm going to do." Callie whispered, like talking at a normal volume would somehow make this so much more real, "He just walked out, I told him, and Brandon just looked at me, like he had no idea who I was, and then he walked out."_

"_He was scared."_

"_I'm scared."_

"_So am I."_

_Callie stared at Stef for a long moment, she couldn't remember the last time she had so much as admitted to being sad, let alone being scared, but it was there on her face, she was scared for Callie, and she was scared for Brandon, and she was scared for everything this meant._

_Not even Stef knew where they went from there._

"_What if Brandon doesn't come back?" _

_Stef managed a small smile, "He's waiting outside right now, Callie."_

_And then she couldn't stop the tears anymore, she had put a smile on her face through so much. Through juvie, through foster homes, through being told she couldn't be adopted, through seeing Liam, she had smiled, and she had smiled, and she had stayed strong, but she couldn't anymore._

_She had never been responsible for anyone else but herself, even Jude, she took care of him, but she wasn't responsible for him, not really, but this baby, this was all her and Brandon, and whatever happened next was on both of them._

"_What am I supposed to do with a baby?"_

_Stef shrugged, "Love her, I guess."_

_**I know it's kind of short, but I have a harder time getting in Callie's head, because she's portrayed as this strong character, yet she can't be strong in every single moment of this story, especially with so much going on between her and Brandon. Also, I realize there is a lack of Lena in this story, eventually the entire family will be brought into the story more, but for now it is centered more around Brandon, Callie, and Sara. Stef is in the flashbacks more simply because both Brandon and Callie are closer to her than Lena.**_


End file.
